5 Silly Expectations That Will Affect Your Relationships
Things You Need to Let Go if You Want to Relate to People Better
You can create healthy relationships and connect to people better, if you don’t have silly expectations around how they should behave.
Expectations are projections. They are based on your beliefs about how people need to treat you. It’s how you want them to act if they have a relationship with you.
Having silly expectations will put additional pressure on your personal and professional relationships.
The Costs of Having Silly Expectations in Your Relationships
If you have silly expectations in your relationships, the costs include:
- You will not develop close connections with others.
- You may miss out on new opportunities that can advance your career or personal life.
- You will not create memories that are deep and meaningful.
- You may have incorrect assumptions about others.
- You won’t develop a high level of trust with others.
Expectations creates separation, which affects your ability to relate better with others. The sooner you let them go, the better relationships you will develop.
5 Silly Expectations That Will Affect Your Relationships
Most times, your expectations will not match up to those others may not want to fulfill. That will make what you expect from others unfair.
Here are five silly expectations that will affect your relationships and prevent you from forming a genuine connection with others.
- Expecting others to know what you are thinking or what you want. People are not mind readers. Explicit communication will prevent you from making incorrect assumptions. If you want others to understand you better, share what’s on your mind or what you want.
- Expecting others to apologise first if you have a disagreement. All relationships will experience disagreements and disappointments. If you have a conflict with someone, do not expect them to apologise first. If you value the relationship, take responsibility and do what’s needed to resolve the situation.
- Expecting a person to behave like someone else. You should not expect someone to act a certain way because you want them to. Everyone is different. If someone’s behaviour does not align with your values, you can communicate what is not working for you and why.
- Expecting others to always take your side. If you make a mistake, it is unrealistic to expect others to defend you or be okay with it. There will also be occasions when other people will let you down because they may change their mind about something. People can choose what’s best for them.
- Expecting others to be available whenever you need something. No one should be on-call if you need them. People’s priorities may not allow them to support you when you need help. If you expect others to drop everything to attend to your needs, you will be disappointed.
Final Thoughts
If you place high expectations on yourself, it’s not realistic to expect the same from everyone you interact with. Some people may have values and beliefs that align with yours and some may not.
If you want supportive and mutually beneficial relationships, let go of your silly expectations because it will make a big difference.
Action Step: If someone is frustrating you, identify the expectations you may have around how you want him or her to behave. Let go of the expectations that are not allowing you to have the relationship you want with that person.
Question: What are other silly expectations that can affect your relationships?
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