5 Surprising Things That Will Happen When You Let Go of Expectations

The Unanticipated Benefits of Embracing the Unknown

10 min readJun 4, 2024

When you know how to let go of expectations, it can lead to many positive outcomes and transformative experiences.

Having expectations can often be a source of frustration and disappointment in our daily lives. We set high standards for ourselves and others, hoping for certain outcomes.

When things don’t go as planned, it’s common to feel let down and have a negative mindset. What if letting go of expectations can lead to surprising changes in your life?

Find out five surprising things that can happen when you let go of expectations and how this simple act can lead to greater happiness and reduced stress in your life.

1-Minute Summary Video

What are Expectations?

Expectations are beliefs or assumptions we hold about how things should or will happen in the future. They are often based on our experiences, societal norms, or personal desires, and can have a significant impact on our thoughts, emotions, and actions.

Expectations can be positive and negative. On a positive note, they can motivate us to work towards our goals and envision a better future. Negative expectations can lead to disappointment, frustration, and a sense of failure if things don’t go according to plan.

Expectations can be consciously or unconsciously formed, and they can influence our perceptions and interpretations of events. They can shape our interactions with others and affect our self-image and sense of control in life.

What Impact Do Expectations Have in Life?

Expectations play a significant role in shaping our lives and experiences. They often influence our decisions, actions, and emotional responses.

The impact expectations have in life include:

Setting ourselves up for disappointed or frustrated if reality doesn’t meet our standards.
Shaping our perception of reality as they create a lens through which we interpret events and interactions.
Influencing our behaviour and actions. When we have high expectations, we may push ourselves harder, take more risks, and strive for excellence.
Affecting our relationships. When we have unrealistic or poorly communicated expectations, it can lead to misunderstandings, disappointment, and strained relationships.
Limiting our ability to adapt and embrace new opportunities. When we hold rigid expectations about how things should unfold, we may miss out on unexpected possibilities or resist change.

Unrealistic and realistic expectations have a profound impact on our well-being, relationships, and overall life experiences.

Recognizing the influence of expectations and cultivating a mindset that allows for flexibility and open-mindedness can lead to a greater sense of freedom, enabling us to navigate uncertainty with greater ease.

Becoming Aware of Unrealistic and Unmet Expectations

So, how can you know if you have unrealistic and unmet expectations?

Common ways include:

Recognize the patterns of thoughts and beliefs that affect your mental and emotional states.
Identify why you feel the way you do, such as feeling disappointed when things don’t go as planned.
Challenge and question why you think and believe things should be a certain way.

As you become more conscious of your expectations, you will realize that many of them were based on external influences or societal norms, rather than your authentic desires and values.

Becoming aware of unrealistic and unmet expectations is a crucial step in the process of letting go. It allows you to take control of your own happiness and to live a more authentic and blissful life.

Examples of Unrealistic Expectations

Unrealistic expectations can show up in many ways including:

Wanting others to always meet your needs and desires without any effort on your part.
Expecting situations to always go according to plan without any unpredictability or challenges.
Wanting others to always agree with your opinions and decisions, when in reality, everyone has their unique perspective.
Anticipating perfection in yourself and others, but the truth is mistakes and imperfections are a natural part of being human.

These examples of expectations can affect how you view reality and whether you believe you have complete control of your life.

It’s important to let go of these expectations to be more accepting of life and cultivate a sense of adaptability and gratitude for all aspects of life.

Letting Go of Expectations

Letting go of expectations is a powerful practice that can bring about profound positive changes. When you release the need to have absolute control and surrender to the present moment, you open yourself up to endless possibilities and experiences.

By letting go of expectations, you create space for acceptance and gratitude. Instead of being fixated on how things should be, you embrace reality as it is and find contentment in the present moment.

When you let go of your attachment to expectations, you free yourself from the burden of disappointment and resentment. You no longer place unfair demands on yourself or others and will have reasonable desire. This will allow for more harmonious relationships, fair expectations, and a greater sense of inner peace.

5 Things You Will Gain When You Let Go of Expectations

Here are five things you will gain when you let go of expectations and become comfortable embracing the unknown.

1. You will experience a greater sense of freedom

When you let go of expectations, a weight is lifted off your shoulders, and you can experience true freedom. No longer bound by rigid notions of how things should be, you are free to explore the vast possibilities that life offers.

Instead of being a control freak and feeling trapped in a box of self-imposed standards, you have the freedom to think outside the box, take risks, and embrace new opportunities.

With this newfound freedom, you can live in the present moment and make active choices that align with your genuine desires and values.

2. You will enhance your relationships

When you hold on to expectations in your relationships, you often set yourself up for disappointment. You may have preconceived notions of how others should behave or what they should do for you.

When you put your expectations into perspective, you allow yourself to accept people as they are. By releasing attachment to your expectations, you allow space for genuine connection and understanding.

You can appreciate others for who they are without trying to mould them into your idealized image. This leads to deeper connections and more authentic relationships based on acceptance, love, and support.

3. You will reduce stress and anxiety

Imagine a life where you no longer feel the weight of constant worry and anxiety. A life where stress doesn’t consume your thoughts, and you can approach each day with a sense of calm and peace. When you let go of expectations, this can become your reality.

The burden of expectations often leads to stress and anxiety. You can become fixated on how things should be, constantly striving for an ideal that may never come to fruition. You may worry about outcomes, obsess over the future, and dwell on what could have been.

But when you release these expectations, you free yourself from this cycle of stress and any ulterior motives. You learn to embrace uncertainty and trust in the process of life. Instead of resisting what is, you surrender to the flow of life and find peace in the present moment.

4. You will have opportunities for growth

Letting go of expectations allows for personal growth to thrive. When you cling to rigid standards and fixed ideas about how your life should unfold, you limit your potential for growth and expansion.

By releasing attachment to specific outcomes, you can enjoy new experiences, lessons, and opportunities for growth. You can become more adaptable and resilient, able to navigate the twists and turns of life with grace and ease.

You will also create space for self-discovery and self-acceptance. When you let go of what society expects of you or what you think you should be doing, you can truly explore who you are at your core.

This exploration leads to self-discovery, personal development, and a deeper understanding of your true desires and passions.

5. You will have greater appreciation for the present moment

When you let go of expectations, you cultivate a deep appreciation for the present moment. Instead of constantly striving for greater achievements in life, you learn to find contentment and joy in the here and now.

By releasing attachment to future goals or outcomes, you can fully immerse yourself in the beauty of each moment. You become more mindful and aware of the small pleasures in life, finding gratitude for what is rather than focusing on what isn’t.

Appreciating the present moment also allows you to experience greater peace and fulfillment. You no longer view happiness as something to be achieved in the future, but as something you can experience now.

This shift in perspective brings a sense of contentment and fulfillment as you learn to appreciate the beauty and blessings that surround you every day.

How to Let Go of Expectations

If you’re ready to let go of expectations and experience the freedom that comes with it, here are a few steps to get you started.

Acknowledge that expectations are simply assumptions you create about how things should be, but often they are not realistic or within your control.
Practice self-awareness and recognize when you are setting expectations for yourself or others. Ask yourself why you are setting those expectations and if they are necessary or beneficial.
Set actionable goals that will cause you to grow and become a better version of yourself. Focus on the process rather than the outcome. Learn to detach yourself from the outcome and find joy in the journey instead.
Practice mindfulness and stay present in the moment. Instead of dwelling on what you think should happen, focus on what is happening right now.
Embrace the uncertainty of life and allow things to unfold naturally, without trying to force or control the outcome.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

1. What happens when you let go of expectations in life?

Letting go of expectations can lead to a greater sense of freedom, reduced stress, and an enhanced capacity to appreciate the present. It allows for personal growth and the development of more authentic relationships.

2. Why is it challenging to let go of expectations?

Letting go of expectations can be difficult because they are often deeply ingrained in our psyche as a way to predict and control outcomes. Psychologically, it requires a deliberate effort to embrace uncertainty and trust in the natural progress of life.

3. Can letting go of expectations improve my mental health?

Yes, releasing expectations can have a positive impact on your mental health by reducing anxiety and stress levels. It encourages living in the moment and can increase overall life satisfaction.

4. How does letting go of expectations affect personal relationships?

When you let go of expectations in relationships, communication can improve, leading to deeper connections. It fosters an environment where vulnerability is welcomed, and authentic bonds can flourish.

5. What are the benefits of living without expectations?

Living without expectations opens up opportunities for spontaneity, allows for personal growth through unexpected challenges, and helps cultivate gratitude by enjoying life as it unfolds.

6. How can I start to let go of expectations?

Practice mindfulness, embrace flexibility in your plans, and focus on appreciating the journey rather than just the destination. Recognize the beauty in unpredictability and allow yourself to experience life without constant pressure to meet specific outcomes.

Final Thoughts

Letting go of expectations can lead to profound changes in your life. By releasing attachment to how things should be, you open yourself up to a world of possibilities and a newfound sense of freedom.

You find that when you let go of expectations, you will invite more positive experiences and opportunities into your life.

So, take a step back, release your grip on expectations, and embrace living a freer life that comes without self-imposed limitations.

Action Step: Identify where expectations are affecting your life. This means observing your thoughts and reactions in various situations to become aware of the expectations you are holding onto. Once identified, challenge the necessity and usefulness of these expectations and release them for a more open and adaptive mindset.

Question: What difference do you think it will make if you let go of expectations?

Ever felt like there’s a dormant hero within you, yearning for more? Delve into the essence of your being and reveal your unique hero archetype. Seize the chance to explore the depths of your character with the Uncover Your Inner Hero assessment. Take the assessment now.