How to Stop Avoiding Facing Your Problems in Life
Why it’s Necessary to Confront Things Preventing You from Getting What You Want
742-How to Stop Avoiding Facing Your Problems in Life
listen to 742-How to Stop Avoiding Facing Your Problems in Life
You cannot achieve everything you want and create the lifestyle you wish for unless you stop avoiding facing your problems in life.
Everyone has problems. If you don’t have problems, it usually means you are not growing or stepping outside your comfort zone.
Why Do People Avoid Facing Their Problems
Common reasons why people avoid facing their problems include:
- It creates additional stress to think or do anything about it.
- They don’t know how to confront their problems.
- It’s a way to escape their past.
- They believe they will lose more if they deal with it.
- It is easier not to do anything about it.
- They rely on hope, meaning they hope their problems will go away.
- They have become used to coping with problems.
When is Avoidance Useful?
When you avoid something, it usually means you are changing your behaviour to stop thinking about or feeling things that cause you stress or discomfort.
Avoidance is useful in situations where:
- Giving your attention to something has no effect on your life.
- You are clear on what to give your focus to.
- Things will not change or improve, no matter what you do.
- It’s better to conserve your energy or redirect it to something worthwhile.
Even if you learn to cope with your problems, your life will not get easier or better, because the issues you are facing have not been resolved.
What Are Signs You Are Avoiding Facing Your Problems?
Signs you are avoiding your problems include:
- You don’t want to talk about something that is uncomfortable.
- You tell yourself things are not that bad.
- You say you will deal with something either “tomorrow” or when you have more time.
- You rely on substances to numb how you are feeling.
- You give attention to other things, so you don’t have to deal with what’s not working.
Avoidance coping and avoidance behaviour will not support you over the long-term.
What Are the Costs if You Avoid Facing Your Problems?
If you continue to avoid facing your problems, the costs include:
- You will lose self-confidence and self-respect
- Your mental, emotional and physical health will get worse.
- You will pretend to be someone you are not.
- Your relationships will suffer.
- You will lose yourself.
- You will generate additional stress or anxiety.
- Your problems will not go away and may get worse.
You will not become the best version of yourself if you don’t face your problems and find solutions to overcome them.
5 Ways You Can Stop Avoiding Facing Your Problems in Life
Facing your problems is the best way to resolve them. Here are five ways you can stop avoiding facing your problems, so you can overcome them and get the outcomes you want.
- Identify the root cause of your avoidance. Find out what is driving your behaviour and causing you to avoid something. Most times, people avoid something because they don’t want to feel the emotions they will have when they deal with it, or because of how someone will react. There are usually beliefs that cause avoidance behaviour, which you need to find out.
- Determine the worse-case scenario. Ask yourself, “What is the worst that can happen if I deal with this problem? And what could happen if I don’t deal with it?” People often assume things and make them worse than they are, which is why it’s valuable to predict possible outcomes.
- Acknowledge your past problems and how you overcame them. No matter which stage of life you are in, you have faced and overcome problems. You could not be where you are today unless you have conquered certain situations that were challenging. Reflect on your experiences and journal how you dealt with challenging times in your life.
- Create a plan to confront your problems. Your plan can include short-term and long-term goals. Define potential outcomes you would like to achieve. Your plan can also include how you will take care of yourself, the people you can reach out to, and actions you will take if certain things happen.
- Focus on the positive things your problems will bring. Every problem has a solution and a benefit. When you use your perspective and look for the good in your problems, you will view them differently. That will also help you find solutions quicker, which means you will be proactive.
What Will You Gain if You Face Your Problems?
When you face your problems instead of avoiding them, you will:
- Build your self-confidence.
- Have more resilience.
- Strengthen your belief you can handle anything that comes your way.
- Learn to better cope with stressful situations.
- Achieve what you want much faster.
Avoiding your problems will not help you become the person you want to be or achieve the results you want. When you stop avoiding facing your problems, you will make things easier for yourself and enjoy your life more.
If you continue to avoid your problems, you will not develop the ability to handle bigger problems, which means you will not achieve higher levels of success. How you deal with your problems will affect all areas of your life.
Action Step: If you are avoiding something, find out why. What’s causing you to avoid it? Predict the worse-case scenario and create a plan to overcome it. Ask for help if you need to.
Question: What are other ways to stop avoiding facing your problems in life?